Communication

When I am with my friends from New York, I speak faster and am a little more blunt and straight forward than when I am with my friends from here in Colorado (my husband says my accent comes out much stronger also).  I am not sure why it is, but the people I know here are much more sensitive and emotional so I have to be careful not to hurt feelings.  I am much more “proper” if you will, around people of authority that I do not know well: the president of the college for example.  Making sure, I offer a firm handshake and use proper grammar, etc.  My friends make fun of me because I talk with my hands A LOT and I animate conversations with noises and gestures when I am trying to explain something. 

Just since this class started, I have realized I am a much better communicator with children than I am with adults.  I am always thoughtful of the child and what they are saying, I take the time to sit down and listen to what they are saying.  I strive to understand their frame of reference so I can better understand what they are trying to say.  Moreover, I always ask questions to clarify.  Of course, I have a story as an example:  My friend C was riding a bike and had put his key in the hole at the end of the handlebar, he had done this many times before.  A visiting teacher told him he could not put his keys in the hole and made him take them out (I did not hear this happen).  I noticed C was just sitting on the bike in the middle of the bike trail.  He was looking sad.  The teacher started telling him to move the bike or he would have to get off.  She was getting upset with him because he started moving the bike but very slowly.  I went over and asked what was going on.  The teacher explained to me what she had told him.  I asked C why he was not moving his bike, he told me that it couldn’t move if he didn’t have keys to start it with.  The situation was resolved-he put the keys back in so he could start his bike and get it going.  I later had a discussion with the visiting teacher about the situation.  I explained to her why it is important to talk to the children rather than just getting upset and assuming they are being defiant.   

If I took this time and effort with everyone I communicate with I am sure I would be a better communicator overall.  Funny what we can learn from our children…